It’s Friday, Brian Wilson has left a world he just wasn’t made for, and Sunday is Father’s Day; pull out those iconic 70s/80s/90s retro-fit-god pics of your old man and post ‘em if you got ‘em, and throw on Pet Sounds while you do it.
This week we asked some male-parent figures in GQ’s orbit to share a few pieces of counterintuitive wisdom they’ve picked up in the course of their journeys along the Dad Road. Not surprisingly, these essays also ended up being about how the process of raising kids inevitably remakes us as well. It’s all connected, part of the do-over aspect of having a kid after having been one; A.J. Daulerio’s essay in favor of co-sleeping is as much about his own father as it is about him, and contains this definition of the therapeutic concept of re-parenting, the process of figuring out one’s own needs “by first considering what the nine-year-old version of me would need. Most of the time, it's love and kindness. And safety—I want to feel safe.”
Sometimes, of course, actual kids just want some quality time in front of a propped-up iPad. Is that wrong? Maybe not. In this endorsement of Studio Ghibli movies as a healthy alternative to brain-rotting childrens’ entertainment, Chris Gayomali questions our assumptions around what does and doesn’t rot young brains, and whether parents averse to TV “are just projecting their own anxieties around [their own] doomscrolling.” And if, like many toddlers, your small children just want anarchy? Maybe let them have a little bit of it as a treat, argues Vince Mancini; you might learn something in the process about what is and isn’t worth fighting a three-year-old over.
Meanwhile, I wrote this post about how you shouldn’t try to clone yourself by turning your kids into the pop-culture things you’re a fan of. RIP my mentions, which before I hit “mute this conversation” were flooded with outraged quote-tweets from readers who are grateful to their parents for showing them Eraserhead when they were nine or whatever. For the record, I fully endorse the argument made in this piece by Lawrence Burney (adapted from his forthcoming book No Sense in Wishing: Essays) about how music can become a point of connection and give-and-take between teenage children and the adults they otherwise want nothing to do with, conversationally.
Last, and most important, dad thing: Josh Gondelman investigates the question everybody who’s ever had a dad wonders: Why do dads watch TV standing up? The answers, which as it turns out are myriad, will surprise you!
In other, non-dad-related news: Heven Haile profiled the indomitable Teyana Taylor, who walked away from an ill-fated deal with Def Jam as a recording artist, put her energy toward acting, and ended up starring opposite some guy named Leo in Paul Thomas Anderson’s next movie. Sam White talked to video-game auteur Hideo Kojima about what’s on his bucket list (and his watchlist.) Frazier Tharpe checked in with Jerrod Carmichael about getting back to classic stand-up after his detour into meta-confessional reality TV.
Esther Zuckerman interrogated TikTok sensation turned Adults star Jack Innanen and his mustache. Celine Song explained why Dakota Johnson orders an arguably pretty weird drink in her new movie Materialists, in theaters now. Paul Thomas Anderson’s next movie. And while it’s not technically “culture” we’re also recommending you read Matthew Roberson’s account of going to bed every night for a week dressed in the full Ebenezer Scrooge nightshirt-and-cap fit, because nothing is more “dad” than just trying to get some sleep. —AP
