We tend to assume that good mothers are wholly devoted to their children, as though becoming a parent replaces every other part of their identity. But long before they were mothers, they were daughters, partners, professionals – people shaped by ambitions and disappointments and private longings of their own.
When we glimpse corners of a mother’s anxiety, pride, criticism or reserve, we might pause to consider whether this reflects a lack of maternal care, or something much deeper.
A gift we can return to, for ourselves and our mothers, is to remember that they are both a parent and a person equally worthy of patience, empathy and understanding.
